The Plights of Plungers, and Patience

"Oh Lord", I said...as I sat up in the bed, wondering if I was going to be able to do much today.  I pulled a muscle in left shoulder, you know the kind...that hurts with every breath.

My ankle was aching badly from overdoing it the past couple of days, and the fybromyalgia soared off the charts with inflammation, suddenly!  It had been an overwhelmingly difficult past few weeks with design deadlines on magazine, internet dysfunction, daughter in ER, a scare of one of my adult sons possibly missing, plumbing, plungers, 

and biting gnats 

with a plight of near insanity.

I just didn't want to deal with my own impatience today.  I wanted to crawl back under the covers where it was safe, where I could hide from today's  duties and drama.  

I wanted to stay there until I got my "Yes" The yes from God on all my concerns...Yes, today is the day I will be pain free, Yes, today sponsors will be beating my door down to fund the ministry...Yes, today my son will be excited for school work and actually follow through without grumbling.  

Yes, someone will pitch in and take care of a few chores...so I can heal up quicker...so I can continue ministry.  Yes, all my adult children will be functioning happily and receive the desires of their heart with loved ones, and ALL at the same time.  

Yes, it will stop raining long enough for property to dry up to mow down the jungle...and repair septic issue. Yes, I will walk past a mirror and STOP counting calories! Yes, my no's will mean no's and be consistent.  Yes, my husband will graciously understand the pain, concerns, fears, and impatience...I sometimes display when feeling weak.  

Yes, you will be able to pay off all debts, and be free of financial worries.  Yes, your house will function in total peace. Yes, you will never have to swat another pesky gnat in your face ever again!!! I could hear the sounds of the political debate in my own head shouting these Yes's as if to campaign for a peace treaty.

The "to-dos" and "to-don'ts" are like sticky notes on my brain, THEY ARE EVERYWHERE!  Waiting...waiting...waiting. Waiting on answers, waiting on direction, waiting to exhale the sighs of relief.

I just wanted my yes.  What do you do when you feel like you have been waiting for 40 years to reach the promise land? Waiting hasn't been my virtue.  However, I know it is a necessary one.  It is in the waiting that you discover a journey into a sometimes very necessary crucifying of your own soul, your thoughts, and plans.  It is through the waiting you find that some things are not priority, and others are.  It is when you wait, you start counting your very own heart beat to hear it continuously flowing life throughout your body, a life that even in the waiting...is blessed to still be in existence. 

Waiting brings challenges of self-control, both in word and deed. 

Sometimes we become so impatient we snatch back the very issue we turned over to God, believing He isn't handling it quickly enough or as we thought it should be.  I know this too well.  Sometimes I let ME get in the way and forget who really is in charge, and I try to take the world into my hands.

  

I am learning to wait in long lines without too much grumbling....keeping pulse steady.  I've learned to breathe slow deep breaths while stuck in crawling traffic.  I'm even learning to be patient with my children's shoes sprawled everywhere but where they belong.  Now, if I could just master the art of patience with one of our cats, Holly, who has to walk a full length circle at least twice....before exiting the door she has been howling at, to be let out...I could almost swear this cat was birthed with a nag demon just to torture ME! 

   

To wait.  What does it mean?  

In the Hebrew dictionary it means to:

yachal yaw-chal' -to wait; to be patient, hope:--(cause to, have, make to) hope, be pained, stay, tarry, trust, wait.

And there it is folks! (be pained)...Seriously?  I know it means to trust, tarry, etc...but PAINED?  I've been in chronic pain for eleven years!  I think I would have learned to wait by now.  No one ever said, it was going to hurt to wait...our Sunday school teachers never taught that lesson.  Who would have ever thought to: WAIT = PAIN?

Then I found the Greek definition:

therapeuo ther-ap-yoo'-o : to wait upon menially, i.e. (figuratively) to adore (God), or (specially) to relieve (of disease):--cure, heal, worship.

Yet, to wait patiently on God...therapeutically, it brings healing, a cure, and relief from disease or DIS-EASE!

I realize that God may never heal my chronic pain, or I may have to function in the dysfunction of this life.  I may never be blessed to be debt free.  As long as I know my debt to God is paid...then I'm okay.  

I know that in all of it, I must wait...I have to wait...I can wait while I worship, and continue while my weak eagle wings grow feathers of strength to soar above these circumstances. While my weary walk becomes a marathon on a mission, I shall run and not faint....as I wait...and wait on my God.  The Maker, shaker, and motivator of my soul!

  

Isaiah 40:31(KJV)But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

Brenda A. Graff
Founder
FOOD FOR SOUL MAGAZINE

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THE BANTERING OF A FOUR YEAR-OLD

-by Nancy McDade

Today I took my 4 year old son to the grocery store. Usually I do the grocery shopping while he is at preschool but, because of all the snow last week, I had to delay shopping for food until today. I was a bit skeptical about taking him because he usually lasts about 10 minutes and, then...he is no longer excited about being at Wal-mart. As I briskly strolled the aisles, he sat in the grocery cart and slowly became just a head poking up above all the groceries that surrounded him in the cart. I tried to limit my purchases to the absolute necessity items instead of the entire list due to the accompanying "little friend". 

After the strolling ended and the must- haves were in the cart, we headed to the check-out line. The grocery clerk chuckled as she saw a little head, with eyes, peering out of the cart at her. As I placed each item up on the counter to be purchased, the clerk rang up the item and bagged it. Soon her "bagging area" was full. With items still in my cart, I proceeded to remove some of the bagged items and put those into the cart. One thing was making this difficult, my 4 year old son was taking up all the room in the cart. As a mom on a mission, I politely told my sweet little boy to "please get out of the cart so mommy can fit all the bags in." Low and behold, my son did not like this idea at all and so he started to protest (Who ever said kids go through "terrible 2's,” just wait until they are 4). 

Now don't get me wrong, most of the time my 4 year old is very easy going but, today was not one of those times. Finally, after much bantering back and forth, I got the groceries in the cart and headed out the door. I held my son's hand with one hand, and pushed the grocery cart with the other. Meanwhile he is trying to pull away, and is doing everything possible to make pushing a grocery cart next to impossible. 

(Little does he know that mommy is protecting him from oncoming cars in the parking lot and, at the same time, many of the groceries were purchased with him in mind.) His behavior actually worsened as I buckled him into his booster seat and then opened the back latch of the car to place the groceries in. Is this my "little angel" who turned and glared at me over the top of the back seat and proceeded to stick out his tongue, in anger, at me? (I am thankful that God gave me a sense of humor.) I am thinking to myself: you have got to be kidding me, he is sticking his tongue out at me. 

I didn't know if I should laugh or spank him. I wonder how often we act like my 4 year old. God is so patient. As we kick and fight to have our own way, He is patiently guiding us just as I guided my 4 year old through the parking lot today. As we think about "me, me, me" He has already thought about us. Just as my 4 year old had no idea that I was buying food with him in mind, God ALWAYS has our best interest in mind. I am so glad that God loves us and He thought of us 2000 years ago. When we were acting like selfish babies, He looked down on us with grace, mercy and compassion and provided a way for us. His name is Jesus. 

Just as a mom patiently corrects her child when he is making bad choices, God patiently waits on us. He does not try to force His will on anyone. Any good parent knows, sometimes you have to be firm and then just step back and wait. Do we give in when our child throws a fit? Do we think our fits can sway God? Do we stop loving our child when he throws a fit? Does God stop loving us? No, we always direct our child back to "the right" way to behave. God always directs us back to His word, the Bible. We don't change the rules just to appease our 4 year old who is not happy. God does not change His rules to appease us. 

In all of this, God loves us even when we act like spoiled babies. I am so thankful for that. At times God allows us to sit in "time out." It is usually in "time out" that we stop and think about our situation. 

What has God done in the past? Is God who He says He is? Can I really persuade God to change the rules for me? After we come to our senses, just like a child in time out, 

we get over ourselves and move on to what God told us to do in the first place. It is there that we find our calling, our purpose. It is there that we find peace. 

Nancy McDade / Contributing Writer for Food For Soul Magazine

Is a wife and mother of two boys, ages 7 and 4. She has been a registered nurse for 21 years and has worked in various areas including orthopedics, general medical, home healthcare, and pulmonary specialty.  She enjoys writing, reading, camping, and spending time with family.  

DIGGIN’ UP BONES

-Brenda Graff

Have you ever had a conversation with someone that left you exasperated?  The entirety of discussion was desperately depressing, lacking direction, and drama-filled over something as simple as a hangnail?  The negativity reeked with every word that spewed out of their mouth like pollutants choking the air.  There was nothing that person could find positive to say.  What do you do in those situations?  Do you hang up abruptly?  Excuse yourself politely?  Or walk away?

It doesn’t take me long in listening to a negative conversation before I have to find the mute button.  That kind of talk is like Poison Ivy to me, it makes my skin crawl with a burning itch to run away.  Understanding, that sometimes an individual is experiencing something painful whether it be physical or spiritual, and need to be dealt with tenderly.  In other words, I would pray for them, offer assistance, or lead them to counseling. I’m speaking more on the chronic complainers, the excavating extremist who live to dig up the dead and carry the corpse for years!

The more we talk problems, the more anxious, depressed, or sick one can become.  It blows my mind when speaking to someone who cannot see the forest for the trees because they are so caught up in their circumstances or blinded with regrets.  

Our perspective over a situation can drastically change how we handle issues.  I attended a Beth Moore’s simulcast a while back, in which she reenacted a corpse scenario. She carried a simulated one across stage, sat with it, drove with it, took it to family reunions, and even tried to give it CPR.  It was hilarious!  Her message was focused on the old self we drag up not accepting grace.  She was reviving a dead past, which keeps one in a constant state of misery, and MISERY LOVES COMPANY. 

This is where the negative conversations come into play.  Some keep breathing life into the corpse until the stench has reached insurmountable proportions and spews onto everyone they run into. We can become like a broken record constantly repeating our gloom, doom, sorrow, and M-I-S-E-R-Y!  We truly need to be careful of what comes out of our mouths.  Life and death are in the tongue.  

Proverbs 18:21Life and death are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit.

In looking up the definition of fruit I found in:

Strong's Hebrew LexiconNuwb noob: means to germinate, i.e.  (figuratively) to (causatively , make flourish; make cheerful, increase.

This sounds like encouragement to me!  Yet the opposite and negative aspect of speaking negatively as it explains in the Greek definition will cause to die away.

Strong's Greek Lexicon akarpos ak'-ar-pos: (as a negative particle) barren (literally or figuratively):--without fruit, unfruitful. 

phthinoporinos fthin-op-o-ree-nos' autumnal: (as stripped of leaves):--whose fruit withereth.

Our words can be fruitful or fruitless.  This means that the words we speak have authority.  We can choose to speak words of encouragement or discouragement.  Each time you encouragingly speak; those words spring forth life not only for you but also to those around you.  

When you speak words of death, then you kill off areas of your life that should produce fruit.  This can also be directed to those around you.  How often have you called someone a not-so-nice name?  Or raised your voice with words of discouragement? Those words can rapidly drain confidence, and break someone’s spirit.  What usually ends up happening is that individual who has been battered with words usually become exactly what was spoken over them.

Negative self-talk is terminal; it’s a self-fulfilling prophecy.  “I can’t, I won’t, It’s too hard”, etc.  How we think and feel about ourselves oozes on the outside!  It shows in our actions, and inaction.  When we believe in the self-doubting thoughts, others start to believe it too.  

(Psalm 64:8, Psalm 52:2)

Our tongues due to their size in nature are considered to be one of the strongest muscles in the body.  It can actually lift up 80 times its own weight.  Do you realize that if your tongue were as big as an elephant’s trunk…it could uproot trees?  It is a powerful and mighty tool.  It can tear down and it can lift up! 

(Proverbs 15:4)

Now before you beat yourself up for misusing this mighty muscle. Stop and ask God for forgiveness, repent, and move on.  David spoke in scripture asking the question:

Psalm 15:3Who does not slander with his tongue? Who does not harm his friend or discredit his neighbor?

In other words, we’ve ALL done it, whether through gossip, criticizing, or throwing darts of deceit.  As Christ followers we need to work on it.  

Psalm 34:13Keep your tongue from evil and your lips from deceitful speech. No one can rightfully say, “I’m a Christian who truly loves God” and in the same breath speak fatal words. 

James 1:26If anyone thinks he is religious without controlling his tongue, then his religion is useless and he deceives himself.

God is about love and when we speak words of hatred, we kill!  

1 John 3:15Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life residing in him.

I can hear it now.  How can you love someone who seems unlovable?  How can you speak kindness to the very one that rips you with venomous words?  You can’t!  

James 3:8But no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.

But God can!  And he can through you, if you let him.  We will experience emotions at times that will cause ill feelings. It would be impossible not to.  You would have to be on heavy sedatives, or wearing a shock collar that reminded you every time you had a sour thought towards someone or a situation. We are not perfected yet, and won’t be until we meet Jesus.  God has emotions, and Jesus expressed anger on earth.  He yelled, he threw items, but his was a righteous anger. 

(John 2:13-25)

The bible tells us it is natural to experience emotions, but do not sin because of it.  

(Ephesians 4:26-27)

It is a matter of not allowing ourselves to get caught up in our feelings, complaining, disgruntled, criticizing, gossiping, and saying things we will regret later.  It only makes you look like a fool and keeps you dark in your circumstances.

The Bible clearly identifies intelligence verses ignorance in conversations and none of it directs us to dig up the dung that has been buried at the cross in someone's life or to excavate our past, living in a constant state of regret. 

(Psalm 37:30, Proverbs 31:26,  Corinthians 14:9)

In all of King David’s grandeur he even had to withstand from making comments in the presence of others who taunted him.

Psalm 39:1“I will guard my ways so that I may not sin with my tongue; I will guard my mouth with a muzzle as long as the wicked are in my presence.”

How many times have we gotten ourselves in trouble from speaking before we think?  We’ve hurt loved ones, and probably even the very ones we relate to in God’s family.

We can choose to speak in love, and live a joyful life, experiencing good days despite circumstances when we control our tongue, thoughts, and emotions. 

(1 Peter 3:10)

There have been more than a few occasions that I chose misery over joy digging up the corpse of conversations buried in my backyard.  They were dug up so many times my yard looked like a minefield.  I’d throw him back in the hole, bury him deep, and then low and behold he would show up at my back door dressed with concern and compassion, but he stunk with death!  I have to be careful whom I converse with or that old corpse might come running through my front door with some of his zombie friends, pizza in hand, and balloons to throw me a pity party.  I have to stay in a mindset of betterment.  

I fell in love with this verse.

Psalm 45:1My heart is moved by a noble theme as I recite my verses to the king; my tongue is the pen of a skillful writer.

David had chosen to use his words artistically, beautifully, and with such grace when he wrote that.  Oh, how I want my lips to drip with honey every time I speak.  I want it to be a sweet savor.  

My desire is to be like EF Hutton, "When EF Hutton speaks, people listen!"  And I want them to listen, not because of intellectual info on the stock market, but rather for words that enlighten, encourage, build up, edify, and speak life.

Let’s bury those corpses of negative comments, and conversations. Bury him good...don’t throw him out to sea, where he’ll wash back up like a message in a bottle bringing bad news.  

I challenge everyone this year to make a conscious effort to guard their lips.  Choose words of life.  Use our tongue for praise instead of penalties.  Live with gratitude instead of grumbling.  We should try to compliment instead of criticize.  Learn to accept instead of accuse.  Keep our conversations useful, and fruitful. 

(Psalm 35:28, Isaiah 50:4)

I love this quote for its truth:

“Save your skin from the corrosive acids from the mouths of toxic people. Someone who just helped you to speak evil about another person can later help another person to speak evil about you.”

-Israelmore Ayivor

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